Autism Meltdown Compliance Drills

Autism Meltdown Compliance Drills

– Hello from Canada. – Hi.
– Hey Canada. – Hi there. I have an autistic eight year old son who has meltdowns, and I see with you and Abbie, after Abbie has a meltdown
you get her to like point to her nose, her head, I’m just kinda curious on what that serves so maybe I can translate to my son. – That’s an amazing question, okay.
– It is. – So, there’s two factors to that Chris. So you have, number one it’s compliance because it’s like okay,
we’re gonna help you get through this but you
have to listen, y’know. So we’re gonna work on compliance here, so what you wanna do,
getting control of oneself and taking a deep breath and
getting a grip basically, because honestly, meltdown’s a tough word and we can talk more about that later because sometimes it is a tantrum also, even though the behaviors are very similar they are very different. So, but to comply with
commands from your parents when you’re tryna calm
down, that’s hard to do. It’s super challenging. To touch ones nose is not. It’s easy, y’know Abbie
knows how to do that, she knows how to touch her head, she knows where her nose is, she can raise her arms
up, things like that. So what you’re doing is you’re setting a pattern of compliance. So it’s like okay y’know
I want you to do this, then do this, and then we’ll
work on the harder stuff so she understands y’know
we’re gonna do these actions and then I’m gonna ask you
to do the harder things. – And we don’t do that, we
don’t ask her to do those things until she’s signing to
use that she’s all done, which means to us that she’s saying she’s all done with the meltdown, she wants to be done with
whatever we’re doing, so then we want to make
sure are you really done? Because sometimes she’ll sign
that to just be done with it. – Get out of it, yeah. – But she’s still, you can
see she’s still elevated. So like the other day I
think on the last vlog where she did have that
meltdown and it was she and I, I knew that she wasn’t ready to be done but she kept signing done, so when we couldn’t get her to spin around I was like yeah, she’s not ready. And it’s to take their mind off of it too. It’s to get ’em thinking
in a different direction. – Right, so that way–
– Well my son gets stuck in a loop, and I need to
break him out of that loop. – Right, so Abbie does–
– So that’s the other reason. – The same thing, she’ll go
right back into a meltdown again too soon, and so. And then the third, so
there’s actually three then ’cause I didn’t even think
about the one Priscilla said. The third reason is to give
them a sense of control. It’s like okay you have, y’know and the ability to communicate. It’s like you have control
over the situation, you can be compliant if
you can show control, then you then have
control and you can choose that you’re done with this behavior, you’re not gonna hurt yourself, you’re not gonna hurt somebody else, so that’s the reason for that. So, now, one thing you do wanna do is that get that set ahead of time. Y’know during a behavior, it’s just like not talking to your kids about
something in the moment, you might wait ’til
later to discipline them or talk about what they did wrong, rather than in the moment
when everybody’s upset. Same situation, don’t
wait until they’re upset to teach ’em how to tap their head. Y’know what I mean? – Yeah.
– Right, make sure it’s something they’re
gonna be successful with. – Yep. – Okay, I appreciate it, I’ll let you guys answer more questions, you guys helped me a lot through the past few years.
– Yay! – That’s awesome Chris. – Awesome, thank you.

65 comments / Add your comment below

  1. Hi everyone
    Remember you're loved by many ppl and I care about you always even though I don't know you it's just like you love others like me 😜

  2. You guys are amazing.. I have just started to watch about a month ago so I'm trying to binge watch all the vids.. Ab has come so far since you started! U guys r awsome parents! Ab is so strong and so very smart!

  3. I can’t tell you guys how much I love your family. I enjoy watching your content SO much! Y’all are such strong people and beyond amazing parents! Thank you for sharing your message, you’re helping so many people! ❤️❤️❤️

  4. I'm glad that Priscilla thought to mention that, in a way, it's also a way to help calm them down and get them headed in another direction as well. It can be a step in the "deep breathing," "body awareness," etc parts of calming down and moving forward.

  5. What a great idea to take small sections of the live and help people who might have a question about that specific subject!
    Thanks! Ive been looking for ways to help my 6 year old son with asd who recently started communicating in a very dictatorial and angry way to his big brother and us. Maybe a time out to regroup and feel in control might help him. Ill see if I can find a way. Keep on rocking Mass-squad 👍

  6. Love the compliance work you guys do with Abbie. You guys are amazing!
    Do you guys ever do DTT (discreet training trials) at home? If so, how do you guys do it?

    I love watching your videos. Thank you for sharing about autism in daily life.

  7. Wow thanks for this info. My 4 year old today had meltdown on his first day of school. It was very very bad. This info is very helpful. He keep going back into it. Its so hard to stay calm when he is attack me and everyone around him.

  8. I know you are inundated with messages, and I don’t expect a reply. I just want you to know how thankful I am that you share your life and journey with us all. You are an inspiration to me and countless others, your joy and spirit and love of life regardless of the daily challenges. You always look forward and move forward. Not all superheroes wear capes.

  9. Thank you so much for this clip. My daughter doesn't quite meet the qualifications for a diagnosis, but we still have issues with sensory proccessing, meltdowns, and compliance and i was just talking to my husband about how we could apply this to our daughter so breaking it down really helped!!

  10. A you guys are real professionals. That’s not meat to sound patronising. I am being sincere. It’s fantastic that you can help and advise other parents in the same situation. Keep it up. We need more people like you in this world. That’s for sure.. 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

  11. Hello from the UK! I've just discovered your channel and you guys are doing an AMAZING job! I'm actually autistic myself, though high functioning and verbal, but I do struggle with pretty much the same issues as Abby (is that the right spelling?) does, it's actually quite interesting to see a video on meltdowns as although I'm 'high functioning' my meltdowns look exactly the same! I was diagnosed late, when I was 14, I'm 16 now, so neither me nor my parents have developed the kind of skills you have for coping, so this was super useful for me to see. You've earned a subscriber! Keep making awesome videos! 🙂

  12. I love this idea of taking small sections from a live/YouNow conversation to highlight a specific topic. I was watching this YouNow and there were some GREAT questions. This Dad from Canada set the bar high with this AMAZING question. Your explanation was excellent and I know this will be helpful to so many people! Thank you, guys!

  13. It's interesting because i've used to work at a private preschool where we had kids 1-6 years old. And we've used that technique with the toddlers, if they were getting to rambunctious or had a meltdown, we would ask them to touch their head and their bellies… it was a great distraction and helped both sides calm down and move on.

  14. As a 16 year old who is admittedly not educated enough about autism, this channel has brought me an entirely new perspective. Abby’s self-awareness and understanding is incredible to witness, and shoots down so many stereotypes that I have fallen into believing about the autism spectrum. Thank you guys so much for what you do, it’s so important for the world to see.

  15. So it’s kind of like a grounding technique too? I often support some people that don’t necessarily have meltdowns, but struggle to come down from their anxieties…. I often ask them to if they can point to something in the room that’s orange or something like that, which, like you said, takes their mind away from it, but also has that calming effect as well as being a task that’s easy for them

  16. will this live stream come up onto youtube? Or just clips? I keep missing your younow lives 🙁 and my younow app wont notify me when you're going live even though I have all notifs turned on. Would have loved to see this one!

  17. Had a bad day at school, come home to a new video from you guys, I love learning about autism just to be able to understand people more, love you guys!❤❤❤❤❤

  18. Hey guys I just wanted to ask if you still have a PO Box open because I would love to send a letter to you or can I send you an email instead? Thanks

    You guys do an amazing job by way keep up the great work😊

  19. I’ve been wondering for awhile why you guys didn’t get another service dog for Abby? I know Maverick used to be her service dog but is no longer working, do you ever plan on getting a new one or do you find it’s not necessary?

  20. I admire the work you do to help educate others. Even if it doesn't work for their child you gave them help. Hope you are safe with hurricane Dorian so close to you.

  21. Great question! I love getting all of these bits of education on your vlogs. My son should be starting ABA soon and his therapist said I will be learning so much. I’m looking forward to it because I know it’ll help our entire family.

  22. I don’t have an artistic child or relative but I still gain so much understanding & for that I am so thankful. There have been times that I’ve witnessed behaviors like Abby’s out in public & now as just a bystander, I’m better informed on how I can avoid escalating the situation and just give an encouraging word to the mama that’s having a hard day.🤗

  23. What to do when my 15 year old autistic daughter has a meltdown in store and she can get aggressive and I can not get her to leave

  24. Another whole side of yall you now I've never been on it before didn't know what it was like very interesting thanks for showing

  25. as an autistic person, videos like this are very interesting to me. i always just assumed yall asked her to do that stuff to get her mind off of the meltdown or whatever is bothering her, and to just kinda double check that shes actually calmed down enough to understand. because from my pov, thats the only purpose that could serve. but its cool hearing that yall have other reasons, that i just wouldnt think of. ik yall help a lot of NT parents understand their autistic kids, but you also help autistic kids understand their NT parents lol

  26. That's so true for everyone.
    When I'm in crisis mode (very upset) I have a hard time listening to anyone or doing what I'm asked to do. When I'm de-escalating, that's when I'm able to communicate more effectively, listen, and do what I'm asked to do.

  27. My 3 year old is autistic, he still does not speak much, so trying to figure out what is bothering him or why he is having a tantrum or meltdown is very hard. When he does have tantrums and melt downs, he hits himself, throws himself on the floor, bangs his head on the wall or floor, if I try to hug him or hold him or try to console him he kicks, bites, does everything he can to get me away. I asked the psychologist what I should do to calm him down, the only advice he gave me was to go to Walmart, find a brush with fine soft bristles and see if he likes the texture and brush his arms or legs. That didn't work it only upsets him more. Do you have any advice on what to do?

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