Borderline Hi today I would like to talk about a very
important topic because I have been affected by it and I have a dual diagnosis which is
Borderline Personality Disorder and if you want to find out what the
symptoms are 5 Myths About Borderline Personality Disorder
so we can bust stigma characteristics and psychological definitions
what is the key that will set you free and help you manage borderline
so if you are ready to find out stay tuned! So borderline personality disorder is characterized
by a prolonged disturbance in one’s mood and it is also characterized by a varied in-depth
disturbance in moods. Lacking acceptance of gray areas, borderline
personality disorder is also characterized by the tendency to label areas as black and
white, good and bad, nice and not nice. So, it is either one or the other.
We might also prefer to avoid outside stimulation. And we also try to avoid any positive stimulation
because of the fear of abandonment or disappointment. For example, we can go from going an intense
love and then an extreme fear of abandonment. We can have an obsessive love and suddenly
feel like we need to run. We frequently experience uncontrolled anger
and anxiety. Even if most people are able to have simultaneous
and contradicting emotions, borderline can only place it at one side at the time.
While there is not a lot known about borderline personality disorder because it is relatively
“new.” A lot of people are being affected by this.
It is also not usually diagnosed. It is also characterized by a strong tendency
of impulsivity. This can be self-damaging. For example, if we are having prolonged anger
we might be more prone to being impulsive. So if we were driving we would speed and drive
recklessly. Behaviors that are reckless. Over-drink, over-eat, things that have a danger
characteristic because of the recklessness and impulsivity.
Also, we have crying spells which can be in inappropriate situations or there are events
that require us to show these emotions and we just don’t have them.
We also have difficulty to experience joy for a prolongued period of time. So we just
have a short-lived excitement. We also exhibit weak abilities to sustain prolongued relationships.
Also having paranoid thinking is a symptom. When someone (this happens to me a lot) you
see someone you automatically think “they are good” but then they do something that
bothers you and completely “demonize them” and their is not turn from that.
Even though this video is not intended to diagnose or cure and you can read the disclaimer
in my website www.bossofmyfeelings.com A diagnosis requires 5 out of 9 criteria to
be present at any given time for a significant amount of time.
And because of that, there are 256 possible combinations. For these symptoms to result
in a diagnosis. The first one is frantic efforts to avoid
abandonment. The second is a pattern of unstable relationships. The third one is impulsivity
on areas that are self-damaging. The 4th is dissociation and having a hard time having
a stable self-image or a sense of self. The 5th one is having recurring suicidal thoughts,
gestures, threats, self-mutilating, and even chronic feelings of emptiness.
Displaced anger and temper. Fights, paranoid ideation.
So one of the good side of being borderline, to add some balance to this. One of the good
characteristics is that
borderline people tend to be very kind and we love innocent child-like things.
And we are great with babies for example. The Founder of DBT, the therapy designed specifically
for Borderline, though it is recommended for those who are highly sensitive or if you want
to build you emotional intelligence it is very helpful.
Everyone should learn these skills. Because they really help you cope in a healthy
resilient way, however, they were originally designed for borderline. The creator Marsha
Linehan describes borderline as feeling emotions as intensely as a second degree burn.
So it is a group of people that respond more sensitively to events. The good news is that
it is treatable and you can learn these skills. I always talk about brain plasticity and the
great findings in neuroscience where we are basically by practicing these cognitive therapies
we are actually training our brain and creating new neuropaths which give us more than “hope”
which is great! because we can be powerful in the decision we make today so if we start
learning DBT for example, we are actually participating in altering restoring the healthy
chemistry of the brain. So this allows us to have more control over our reactions. So
it is like building your emotional intelligence muscles because before you make a decision.
Before you do something there is a time that before you react, you analyze and do some
introspection and from that analysis which is unbias and very honest You will be able
to, before you make a decision, you evaluate the consequences or outcomes. So instead of
over-reacting this allows us to regroup. This is great because it allows us to regulate
our emotions. That is why DBT was created in the way it
was. Distress Tolerance
Emotion Regulation Mindfulness and DBT
Interpersonal Relationships So this is a great therapy because you can
implement it in the long term and the secret to anything to work is to be CONSISTENT.
So now let’s bust 5 Myths About Borderline Personality Disorder.
Let’s Bust Stigma. Myth 1: People with BPD have the tendency
of being violent individuals and harming others. That is a myth because someone with borderline
will actually go at great lengths to avoid hurting anyone even
if it is at the cost of hurting themselves. There is a tendency of giving up your happiness
to see others happy. So we would sacrifice our own needs and wants for others. We would
go out of our way to take are of others because of that fear of abandonment so we do anything
to hold on to those relationships and we would avoid anything that would put us at risk of
having those relationships reject us. We rather hurt ourselves that hurt anyone else. So we
direct that anger inward. Myth 2:People with BPD are manipulative. Sometimes
it might seem as we are seeking attention. Because of behaviors of a borderline are difficult
to understand because of the intensity of them and it is hard for anyone to comprehend
why would someone engage is such behaviors. To see someone engaging in those behaviors
can be shocking and scary. Because of these behaviors we evoke such an intense response
from others, and these behaviors have ironically led to the belief of “manipulative,” “seeking
attention.” But you can infer a person intentions by their
actions or symptoms. The problem with this is that you can infer a person intentions
by the effects of his or her behaviors. For example, saying someone with BPD attempts
suicide to get attention is relatively equal to saying that someone ran a red light to
hit a pedestrian. So it doesn’t really tell us why would someone
would engage in such behaviors. Myth 3: Borderline is a life sentence. This
is a myth that came from borderline being relatively “new”
So at the beginning when it was starting to get diagnosed it was a life sentence for these
people. Because there was not anything at the time. But now there is DBT and so many
other cognitive therapies that we can learn. So it is treatable.
The last myth is that borderline is caused by bad parenting. So not everyone that has
been diagnosed with borderline had bad childhood or bad parents. Though being neglected as
a child or abused plays a big role in developing borderline personality disorder. Not everyone
that develops it has had these experiences. So if you enjoyed this video make sure to
subscribe. Also visit BossOfMyFeelings.com because I’m planning in creating a webinar
just on DBT Dialectical Behavior Therapy. A full 60 minute workshop to learn how it
works and how you can implement it in your life. Don’t forget to share and tag a friend
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