The Nice Girl Syndrome. The Good Girl Syndrome. How to Stop Being “Nice”

The Nice Girl Syndrome. The Good Girl Syndrome. How to Stop Being “Nice”


Good Girl Syndrome Nice girl syndrome. Let’s talk about the good girl behavior. My name is Elena Semenek and welcome to my
channel “Psychology of Happiness”, where happiness
is the purpose of life. So who is a good girl? THE GOOD GIRL is loving, caring, supportive,
amazing person. She is going to help everyone on the street
in the store. She is going to be the greatest daughter,
the best friend, the best coworker worker. If you need help at work, she will help you
to do your project. If a boss will ask her to stay late, she will
and she will finish everything that the boss will ask her to do. She will be a volunteer helping other people
for free and if she needs help and you cannot help her, if you say NO to her, she will be
OK with that too because she cannot be mad, she cannot express her anger, she cannot express
her negative feelings. She is loving, caring and understanding person. So if she needs help and you cannot help her
for some reason, she will be OK with that. So the good girl is the person who leaves
for others, who is helping others. She’s a great mother. She’s always there for her children. She’s the best wife because she’s always supporting
and she’s always on her husband’s side and she’ll never say NO. So the only person that she will never help
is herself. The sad part of being the good girl is that
people are gonna use you and that’s really sad because at some point of your life you
will understand that people are using you more, and more, and more, and you’re not gonna
feel happy. You’re gonna feel disrespectful, you’re gonna
feel sad. You will feel lonely and at some point, you
can get into deep, deep depression. So what to do? How can you get rid of this “good girl syndrome”? That’s not that easy and I recommend not to
do it on your own. I recommend going to a therapist, to a life
coach… but if you want to try it on your own, it’s
possible. It’s hard, but it’s possible. What you have to do is just one thing, you
have to become a BAD girl. So you need to do the opposite. You have to allow yourself to be a bad girl. You have to allow yourself to express your
anger. You have to allow yourself to say NO. You have to take care of yourself first and
then of others. So when someone is asking you to do something
for them, for a second, think inside yourself that you are a bad girl. So, I’m a bad girl. I’m a selfish girl and what a selfish person
will do in this situation and then do it. And what’s going to happen? The whole world is going to turn against you. And people will start blaming you. At first they will say, is everything okay
with you? You’ve been stressful lately. What’s wrong? Are you okay? Is something happen? And then they will start blaming you. They will say, why are you talking to me this
way? Wow. I just ask you for a small favor. Wow. Don’t be so mean. Wow. Don’t be so rude. What’s wrong with you? You’ve never talked to me this way. So people will start blaming you, put a lot
of guilt on your shoulders because they will try to put you back in the “good girl” position
so they can continue using you. Of course, they will not do it on purpose
(I hope) but this is the natural way of reacting, so you have to be really, really strong, to
face bad reaction and it’s not gonna be from one person. It’s going to be from everyone, your family,
your friends, your coworkers, your boss, and that’s why it’s very good if you have a therapist
or life coach who can give you extra support in this situation. You have to keep this going, the selfish,
the bad girl behavior, at least for one month and at some point people will start realizing
that you are a different person and some people will just disappear from your life because
they can not use you anymore. They will disappear and they will no longer
be your friends, which is totally okay. You don’t want people who are using you in
your life, right? Other people will start considering your opinion. We’ll start respect in your desires, will
start to respect you as a person, and at that point, little by little, you will start changing
your life so little by little, you will start saying
NO, and little by little you will start to take
care of yourself The whole process can take 6-7 months, maybe
a year, but little by little. It’s going to be easier. The first month, maybe first two months is
gonna be critical. It’s going to be the hardest time ever, but
after that, new people will come into your life. Selfish, bad people will disappear from your
life, and other people will start respecting you, and you might get a better position at
your work. You might get better friends in your life. You will have better self-esteem. You will feel more confident and your life
will be happier every day. If you would like to know more about this
topic, leave your comments below, ask you questions, and if you’re a “good girl” – Good luck! You have to change this, not for anyone else,
but for yourself, and if you would like to know “how to be confident”,
“how to be noticed”, I will leave the links to other videos below this one in the description. Check them out and please share this video
with your friends. Posted it on your twitter, facebook. Subscribe to my channel, click the bell icon
to receive notifications of new videos and thank you for watching “Psychology of Happiness”, where happiness
is the purpose of life!

5 comments / Add your comment below

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  2. I really needed this. Thanks. This is the best ‘say no’ vids I’ve seen so far. Look forward to more.

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